Forgiveness liberates. If we bear a grudge against our neighbour, then we are under the control of that person. We are not truly free. The resentment which we feel is a barrier which stops God from working in us and through us. Only by freeing ourselves from our own resentment can we open ourselves to God. Only by loving others can we share in God's love for all - even the most sinful.
When we forgive, we are not denying that we have been hurt. We live in a world where pain is a part of life. We cannot deny that when we trip up and graze ourselves, or when the bread-knife slips, it hurts. But we do not blame the kerb-stone or the bread-knife. Often, other people hurt us accidentally, because they are wrapped up in their own concerns. It is not for us to judge them. In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus is insistent that if we judge others, we will ourselves be judged.
We may think, so what? We may think our conscience is clear. We may think we have nothing to fear from judgement - that we are in the right and the other person is in the wrong. But it is just this view which blocks God's grace from working in us. This is the outmoded view of Old Testament times, before people were ready for the Gospel. "Eye for eye, tooth for tooth, hand for hand, foot for foot." (Dt 19:21) is no longer a command, but "if anyone strikes you on the right cheek, turn the other also" (Mt 5:39).
When we ask in turn for God to forgive us, as in the Lord's Prayer, we are recognizing that it is in God's nature to forgive. God's Reign will surely come, and forgiveness is a part within it. Nothing can be more certain, and the Lord's Prayer is a series of requests to involve ourselves in the hastening of that process. Forgiving others really does hasten the coming of the Kingdom.
Perhaps the hardest task of forgiveness is to forgive ourselves. Even when we can accept and forgive others, we often continue to blame ourselves for things that have gone wrong. Even if we do not seek to condemn or to punish our neighbours, we feel we must condemn and punish ourselves. But this too blocks out God's gracious love for us. This too puts us under the control of our own sins.
Forgiveness puts the past firmly behind us. It enables us to accept and to pass on God's love. For through Jesus, we have been redeemed from this very thing - the slavish control which sin has over us if we fail to forgive.
HD